Hot Fun in the Summertime

Just a couple random observations for you, from me.

To start, I've had it with summer. No, really--feel free to remind me of this in the winter, when I'll be running outside and am able to breathe and won't be sweating through my clothes every 2 minutes. Seriously. Because I am a winter girl. I've come to realize I'm so fat that I'm no longer a solid at room temperature. I melt instantly-as witnessed by the backside of my shorts. Gross.

And also, a fond farewell to Mytch. "Who's this Mytch?" you ask? Well, he was the ginormous ovarian cyst who was residing, well, on my ovary. He was a big effer--16 cm to be precise--and we'd thought he'd taken up permanent residency, with no end to his growing. Until this morning, when he apparently burst. Last night I said to C I felt like the entire left side of my belly was a--pardon the terminology--dead zone, as I couldn't feel any baby moves over there. Then, overnight, I started feeling this little guy in different places, and it continued this morning until KERBLAAAAM! Pressure. And a minor freak out. After a trip to the doctor, and an ultrasound, Mytch was no longer present. Ciao, bitch. Although it's a teence painful right now, Little Trois is doing great in there.

Lastly, I seem to have forgotten how to sleep through the night. Nothing so dramatic as getting up and out of bed, but I tend to wake up nearly every hour, wait for Little Trois to move before eventually falling back to sleep. I'm hoping with Mytch's departure things will improve. But I'd really like to be able to sleep all night. It makes me a little grumpy.

All that on top of another month rolling by, another 9th coming and going and now we are 7 months out. It still sucks ass big time. There's a lot about this that sucks ass, the worst of it being without my little girl who's supposed to be here. And isn't, and won't ever be. I miss that girl, that family I thought we'd have, that future and this summer it was supposed to be. But who am I to suppose that "supposed to" was "supposed to be?" When obviously, joke's on me, it wasn't.

I am ready for summer to be over. And, I'm hoping for one or two drama-free weeks. Please?